Monthly Archives: August 2010

Got a spare minute? Don’t read this, there are plenty more productive things to do. (See: Throwing rocks at trains.)

Today, I went wave-dancing.  The sea was so endlessly beautiful, like a swimming pool of beer, and it smelt like jelly fish.  What a great time!  But, when I got out of swimming pool full of beer, I was drunk.  … Continue reading

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Trick or tweet LOL!!

About 30 suns, 4 rainstorms, and 5 beautiful swan sightings ago, I wrote a blog about how I am putting in my best effort to get the boot from twitter.  I put some belief into the empty hope that one … Continue reading

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I hate my voice and say stupid things;

You click and bear witness. I wrote the story on that page.  It’s about the time me and Morgan Freeman were really old and met in a hospital and made a bucket list of things we wanted to do before … Continue reading

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My friend Eddy sometimes spikes up the front of his hair.

I just saw something of a film.  It was entitled Dinner for Schmucks.  If I was really bad at making jokes, I would say “More like Movie for Schmucks!” and you would be unimpressed.  I’m going to ramble on about … Continue reading

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Gambling!

Some people go to the racetrack to bet on horses.  Others (specifically P@rtyyy @nim@l5) go to Las Vegas to play black jack (and P@rtyyy!!!).  But me, personally, I get my gambling kicks on facebook. There is a fella on that … Continue reading

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A normal topic of writing:

My 5th grade teacher’s name was Mrs. Gamberg.  When she was young, she probably had lots of unprotected sex and might have been a frequent user of cocaine.  But that was in an era long before I knew her.  An … Continue reading

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My first guest contributor!

It is with overwhelming excitement and pleasure that I announce to you embrace the goose’s first guest contributor.  I present to you the writing of….. Drunk Brendan! Drunk Brendan is a mischievous devil of a human who comes around far … Continue reading

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